Is there anything about submission (yours or what
you see in others) that you question, dislike or repels you? Was there a time
you questioned or were resistant to your own submissive feelings?
I used to question everything about being a submissive. In
my family it was taught to never need a man. Never depend on him to provide for
you. Never trust him. I was to grow up,
have a career, and be independent. Falling in love was the last thing I ever
thought I would do and certainly not so young. He was a one night stand that
just never seemed to end. He was unlike any man I had ever been around and He
treated me better than anyone ever had.
It did not take me long to realize that He was my
everything. I gave up my career for Him.
I followed Him from Air Force Base to Air Force Base. Every move brought us closer and closer
together and my childhood teachings fell farther and farther away. I depend on
Him for everything and would be lost without Him. I often question if being so
dependent on my Master is a healthy thing but it comes naturally to me. I like
knowing He provides for me and takes care of me.
Sadly, I was raised to believe the same things. Now, I look at where my mom is...alone and bitter. She doesn't know about our dynamic but told me the other day that she's envious of the relationship we have.
ReplyDeleteI have watched both of my sisters go through multiple divorces and my Mom is miserable in her marriage. I am sure if they knew our relationship details they would all be horribly judgmental but we are the only couple in my family to still be together after 15 years. That really does say a lot.
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