I have started this post and deleted it several times. Some things are just hard to talk about. Some things are just personal. Isn't it strange that I can talk about sex and beatings, but talking about other things makes me uncomfortable.
Master is in the military. He is EOD (think the movie "The Hurtlocker"). He is bomb squad and so much more. He has deployed several times. He has been sent home early due to injury every time. It is my worst nightmare - life without Him. He leaves again in June and we will start a long distance relationship. We find that we grow closer with our time apart but it is still torture. We have been together since August 31, 1998. The only times we have been separated is when the military sends him somewhere I can not go.
We are in the countdown. I have to help find his gear, pack his equipment, organize the household things, and just get ready in general. He will be gone until February - 8 months. He will still approve our calender, our meal plan, the bills, our holiday plans, and anything else he controls now. We will talk daily and email constantly but the time difference will make it difficult.
It is just a sad day for me.
One a happy note, I was able to clean the kitchen today and start a Pot Roast for dinner. Go me!! I am slowly getting better.