Pieces

Sometimes  the person the world sees is so different from the person I really am. We live in a world full of harsh judgmental people who like to tear down every one around them. For this reason I appear to be a strong, independent woman who can take on the world. I don't let others know when things bother me and I don't ask for help. My family would never put the words submissive and Me in the same sentence. The schools have learned to fear me and the pediatricians usually don't like me.

I am ok with this.

Dinner with my family proved to me how much they do not know about me. My Mom kept going on about how independent I am. How wonderful it is that I don't *Need* my husband and can stand on my own two feet. My baby sister kept talking about this club or that club that she just had to take me too. How we should go out and drink together without the husbands.

I don't feel independent. I actually feel like a crazy person when He is gone. I just keep going because He wants me too. And I would NEVER go partying or drinking without Him. I have not gone out like that without Him since I was 18. It would not happen. Not because He would not allow it, but because I find it disrespectful to Him. Alcohol and crowds make people do stupid things. I don't personally like stupidity.

I find myself feeling lonely. So few people actually know me. And even less know me as a Pet and a Mom and everything else that makes me who I am. I think that is why I like my Blog so much. I am just Me - Like it or not. I can put all of the separate pieces together and not worry about what the world thinks.